Don't Mind Me...

I think this could be classified solidly under "O" for the "Only Funny to Me" files:

If you were a professional astrologer, a tarot card reader, I think you could thus safely be called a "Taroist." And if so, would that not be the best profession to use to mess with people at the airport. Name and occupation? "David Ford, I'm a taroist." I think you'd atleast get a few looks. Better still if you were Arabic, or at least brown in colour, then you'd have the advantage of being automatically profiled.

Or alternately, if you were to happen to meet a guy on the plane named Jack, you could say something like, "Hi Jack, I'm a taroist."

Less funny, admittedly, if you ended up in jail, but funny nonetheless.