The Heat is On...

The news says it’s snowing in Canada. A late spring snowstorm. A total annoyance for everyone at home I’m sure, who is set for the cold and wet to be done and the warm sunshine to begin. As for me, I’m nostalgic. I would give anything for just a touch of chill in the air right now, a snowflake on my tongue, slush in my boots and the smell of melting dogshit in the snowbanks… Ah spring.

The past two days have been the opening salvo of a "Heat-Wave" here in Karachi. The thing is, when Pakistanis are telling you that it’s a heat wave, well, you know that it’s damn hot. It would be like someone from Grand Prairie, Alberta telling you not to worry, it’s just a cold snap. Yesterday, the temperature peaked out around 40 degrees Celsius (around 105 Fahrenheit for all those of you who prefer measurement systems that don’t make much sense and are hard to spell). The radio says it’ll go higher today, which I for one think is fantastic. There is a hot wind coming from inland somewhere, which is really annoying, I tend to enjoy my breezes to be cool. It’s kind of like opening the oven, sticking your face down there, and saying, "Oh, nice breeze."

To add insult to injury the Air Conditioner in my office broke down yesterday, so I was basically just a big puddle of uselessness. The value of Air Conditioning was unknown to me before moving here, in that I had previously not realised that it is the single greatest invention known to humankind. When I finally made it home last night, I had only one thing on my mind. I opened the fridge and reached for the frigid comfort of… nothing… Zubair drank the last beer the other night.... Everything is Zubair’s fault lately, so I cursed a pox upon him. But then, in a flash of epiphany, or perhaps it was the synaptic aftermath of my brain melting, I remembered that I had both Gin and Tonic. Luckily, gin and tonic are the two main ingredients of my favourite summertime drink, the Gin and Tonic. I was missing a lime wedge, but in such dire times, allowances must be made. As the sweet juniper-berry goodness slid down my throat, I felt a refreshing burst of energy that gave me just enough of a boost to lie on the couch in front of the TV and sweat. Good Times.

And the best part is, in the words of a great Canadian, "B-b-b-baby you ain’t seen nothing yet…"