Are you being served?

It’s taken me quite some time to get used to servants. In fact, in many ways, I would say that I’m still not used to them. I don’t even know what to call them. Some people call them "Peons", some "Domestic Help", some just "The Domestics," some just "the Help," sometimes "House-Boy." I just can’t do it. I usually just call them, "The Dudes." As in: "I wonder when The Dudes will be bringing my breakfast…"

It doesn't bother me. It’s not a moral thing. I know that they wouldn’t have a job otherwise, and that they are generally well treated and well fed (at least in all the households that I frequent). I guess I’m just not used to asking someone to do my menial tasks (besides mom of course).

My friends tell me that I have to be assertive or the help will walk all over me. I try my best, but since the dudes rarely speak English, it can be a little tough. Where I’m staying right now, it was apparently not clear for a while that I do not speak Urdu. I’m generally quite proud when people think I might just be a local, but this became a little awkward. The dudes would walk up to me, ask me questions, and generally just chat away at me. I would stroke my beard and look thoughtful while I tried to gauge the tone of voice enough to assertively nod and say "Hmm, Yes." I was a little worried that my arbitrary yes and no answers might have caused some trouble, but none seem to have surfaced (although my shirts are a bit more starched than I like, and I’m not sure why there’s a Russian girl in my room every night).

I’m sure I am the source of much mirth in the servant quarters. "Guess what the Gora did today tee-hee." I don’t mind too much, I like to entertain, even if I don’t realize it. And as I get used to servants, I realize that I will be really irritated when I don’t have them. It's just so convenient. Imagine having your clothes disappear and then reappear washed and pressed and hanging in your closet. You get back from work and your bathroom is cleaned, your bed made and your room swept.

It’s like having elves.